I talked to 2 people that are yet to go to the prom, 1 person who was a little older who went to prom, and 1 older person that didn't go to their prom. I got a variety of answers.
The first person I talked to is going to prom on thursday. They didn't seem to think very highly of prom and I know that they were thinking of not even going. When I asked about it they said "I think it's over rated and I expect it to be whack", when I asked why they said "I just do, I don't think it's gonna be fun at all I have high expectations and I know they're not gonna be met". I agree with them, I think that it is hyped up too much, it's supposed to be this huge night so I understood why they thought it wasn't going to be good because it is already being hyped up so they're going to have high expectations for it.
The next person I talked to is in the 11th grade and they had different thoughts. They seemed a lot more positive about it, which I like, so I'll include the whole thing they said (positivity ^^^). "I want to participate in everything in prom because if you dont participate in everything in prom then there is no point of going. even the sex and drinking thing I guess. there is nothing that I want to regret, if people are having fun, i want to have fun too because it is going to be one of the last times I will be able to see all of the people I met in high school. I want to make the best of it. I think that prom is necessary because it is supposed to be a fun experience. I feel like people who wouldn't go to prom don't want to have fun or may have some religious reasons against it. I don't think its all about a date but I think its about going looking your best for one last time then just having fun. I think prom should be seen as more of a celebration like a party and less of a formal meeting or some sort of wedding. I think teenagers should get to act like teenagers at prom and not like they are getting married." I thought this was the best answer I got. I completely agree with them, I think prom is really (and should be) about having fun with the people you have spent the past years with in school.
The next person I talked to went to prom already. I asked them about the dominant social practices and their own experience. They said, "alcohol consumption, sex at the end of the night, and awkward dancing with teachers watching. Usually, people go overboard and someone gets sick or sucks too many penis's and ruins their reputation." I thought this was interesting because I have heard stuff like this but it's funny to think that all this stuff is incorporated with prom which is this school event. This is supposed to be this formal thing but yet all these things are happening and it is regularly associated with the prom.
The last person I talked to was my father who didn't go to prom. "I didn't dance and it just wasn't something I was into at the time". Although it's not the reason he didn't go, he was working on the night of the prom "out for the almighty buck". He said, "There was a part of the society that was rebelling against the dominant social practices. It was a time of a lot of change, with the civil rights, women's liberation, black panthers, resistance to the Vietnam war. So these typical social standards were being questioned and challenged and weren't being accepted. I was more drawn to that type of attitude." I thought this was very interesting because I can relate this very much. I myself feel this a lot, I question a lot of the things I'm told to do and a lot of the traditional ways and dominant social practices. Back then you weren't supposed question anything, and I think now it is becoming more acceptable to question things.
All of these gave me different views and opinions about the prom. I think I can agree and relate to points in all of them.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
HW 57
I haven't thought about prom much. To me it doesn't seem like such a big deal. I know that it is a big deal to a lot of other people. It's supposed to be the "perfect night". You have to dress up your best, get a date and get a limo to drive you.. All that type of stuff. Me personally, I would prefer to go in a t-shirt and basketball shorts and ride a bike over. I think that it is some type of thing that teenagers have to have responsibility and get ready for this big night. It seems like it is a night of living like the richest, even though you're probably not. I guess when you think about it, it is kind of some type of rights of passage in our society, it's like a wedding or some type of rich formal party, but when I think of it I think it's just a party to have fun with your friends before everyone graduates high school and goes off to college. I've seen both my brothers go to prom. It seemed more serious and traditional for my older brother, he was all dressed up in a suit (which is very rare that you see that), his girlfriend had her dress, my mom was taking pictures of them before they left for prom. It seemed less serious for my other brother, he was just hanging out with his friend in my house before he left, I don't really remember much about when he went because it didn't seem like as big of a deal. I know that both of them went to after parties which is like a less formal party without the teachers there after the prom. Overall I think that it is looked at too seriously and it should be laid back and less of a structure of how prom is "supposed" to be.
-Was prom always the same way or did it change over time?
-Is prom really a rights of passage to teenagers? Do adults look at them differently after?
-Is there a reason prom is set up the way it is?
-Why do you HAVE to dress up for prom?
-Was prom always the same way or did it change over time?
-Is prom really a rights of passage to teenagers? Do adults look at them differently after?
-Is there a reason prom is set up the way it is?
-Why do you HAVE to dress up for prom?
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Extra Credit Thing!
I went to two public cemeteries with Chris and Kevin unfortunately not at midnight. They were both around each other. The cemeteries were: St. Pauls Cemetery and Trinity Church Cemetery. To be honest I felt no difference whatsoever in these cemeteries then I would feel in a park with benches. I think part of this was because the cemeteries were so old. Both cemeteries had dead people from the 1800's. I guess this made it harder to feel anything because it is hard to feel some kind of connection when this time was so long ago.
The tombs were very old and not many were in good condition. There were all types of shapes for the tombstones and all types of different writing on the tombstones. Some just had the person's name and birth and death, some had quotes, and some had words about the person. There were many tourists around taking pictures and just walking around looking. No one was sad, I'm sure this is because no one knew any of the dead people there!
There were so many tombstones it made me think to myself is it worth it to use up all this land to have tombstones? I started thinking about this. I feel like cemeteries are just there to give people a physical thing that you can talk to when someone you know dies. It's like a substitute of a person in a body, this way you have to go visit the grave etc. But why can't you just talk to the person out loud or in your mind? It's not like speaking to a tombstone actually makes the dead person hear you. I don't know I guess I don't really understand why you need this physical thing to remind you of the person, their memories should already live in your mind.
I think this experience would have been very different if it were actually a cemetery where people that have died recently were buried, or someone I actually know was buried in the cemetery because these old cemeteries made it hard for me to feel any kind of feelings or connections.
Going to these cemeteries just made me think: what is the point of cemeteries? Is it just a waste of land?
Myspace pic flow LOL
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
HW 56
My comments on other blogs:
John:
I liked your post. I found this part of the first paragraph very interesting: “This thoughtless automated response is now tradition when we hear of someone’s death, it becomes more beneficial to the person who said the “sorry”(person A) than for the person who feels sorry for herself(person B). When person A tries to comfort person B, person A is in fact comforting themselves believing that they have comforted person B. However, person B has encountered plenty of person As and feels no less stricken with grief, yet if person A was to not give this response it would be perceived as rude and inconsiderate.” I never even thought about this and it makes me realize how society gives us a certain role to play and even though it may not help the person out you are considered rude if you don’t do it.
Casey:
I liked this post because you had very good research and you gave a detailed timeline of how the coffin/casket has changed over time and why it did. Then I also like how you talked about why making your own coffin/casket is good. By talking about your experience making your own (even though yours was a mini one) it showed kind of like what the experience of making your own casket would be like. Creative idea!
Sophia:
I liked your post I thought the idea was very interesting to look up: what would happen if you just left a body to rot? I was surprised that it takes almost 20 years to completely decompose! It makes sense that people are buried under ground. Then most importantly I like how you connected it back to people embalming bodies and getting "sealed" caskets in this fantasy that they're body will remain the same forever. Nice post.
Chris:
Chrissss nice post maaaan. I like how we both have narratives of our experience but they are different. I thought it was interesting to see how you thought about the funeral home and how people were acting etc etc. I also like how you included dialogue because even if I wasn't there, I feel like it makes it very descriptive and easy to picture. Even though the project didn't go as planned and we didn't have a video, you did a good job writing about it..
_______________________________________________________
Comments on my blog:
Chris:
I like what your mom said. She is really right about the preparation part but I like a lot of what you wrote. I feel like narratives should be exactly what you were thinking because it is your narrative. If this is how you felt about the topic then I think this is good. My favorite line was when you introduced everyone because these were the "characters" in the narrative and the way you set it up actually made me interested in wanting to read this even though I was there. I feel like your mom was right at the end too when she said write down certain questions and I feel like thats how this post could have been better. I seriously do like this post a lot though I'm just supposed to say something that is a criticism and thats the only thing I think that could have helped.
Mom:
Sounds like the experience was not very successful. Your writing seem a bit too "light" for the subject. I think you all must prepare more for this type of assignment and have a plan B to fall back on, if something fails. You have been to several funerals and could maybe have reflected on your past experiences and compared them with the other people in the group. Write down certain questions for the funeral director etc.
Kevin:
For a project that doesn't really prove anything, you did a good job writing about it. You wrote a decent amount, and in that amount you started to make some insights. What you didn't do was expand on the insights you started to make. You could have talked more about the serious feelings that you felt and the dress code that you noticed.
What your blog did do: It was entertaining. It was like Seinfeld, about nothing, but at the same time the way you wrote made it more interesting then most other projects with heavier content. It was definitely more interesting then my project.
What you should have done is reflected on the experience. You could have wrote about what you learned through your failure. There was a couple of things you could have talked about learning but you failed to do so.
Sophia:
I really liked this part:
"Even though this didn't work out as we wanted I still looked at it as a somewhat successful experience. It showed me how serious and sensitive death is to people. I saw how serious the dress code was because I felt horrible that I was the only one (besides Kevin) who wasn't dressed up in a black suit and I don't know if I should feel bad about that. I saw how the funeral home approaches death, because the vibe of serious and quiet was very strong as soon as you walk in the place."
This was my favorite part, because I always wondered why people dressed up for funerals. It doesn't really make sense - when people are unhappy, they generally don't want to put a lot of effort into the way they look. I suppose it is out of respect, but I still don't understand why people would be so strict about it.
Ruben:
Jasper, I liked how you and your group decided to go for a hands on experience. Even if you weren't ready for the wake, your group members still tried to get as much information as possible. What you learned from this experience should help you with other projects in the future.
John:
I liked your post. I found this part of the first paragraph very interesting: “This thoughtless automated response is now tradition when we hear of someone’s death, it becomes more beneficial to the person who said the “sorry”(person A) than for the person who feels sorry for herself(person B). When person A tries to comfort person B, person A is in fact comforting themselves believing that they have comforted person B. However, person B has encountered plenty of person As and feels no less stricken with grief, yet if person A was to not give this response it would be perceived as rude and inconsiderate.” I never even thought about this and it makes me realize how society gives us a certain role to play and even though it may not help the person out you are considered rude if you don’t do it.
Casey:
I liked this post because you had very good research and you gave a detailed timeline of how the coffin/casket has changed over time and why it did. Then I also like how you talked about why making your own coffin/casket is good. By talking about your experience making your own (even though yours was a mini one) it showed kind of like what the experience of making your own casket would be like. Creative idea!
Sophia:
I liked your post I thought the idea was very interesting to look up: what would happen if you just left a body to rot? I was surprised that it takes almost 20 years to completely decompose! It makes sense that people are buried under ground. Then most importantly I like how you connected it back to people embalming bodies and getting "sealed" caskets in this fantasy that they're body will remain the same forever. Nice post.
Chris:
Chrissss nice post maaaan. I like how we both have narratives of our experience but they are different. I thought it was interesting to see how you thought about the funeral home and how people were acting etc etc. I also like how you included dialogue because even if I wasn't there, I feel like it makes it very descriptive and easy to picture. Even though the project didn't go as planned and we didn't have a video, you did a good job writing about it..
_______________________________________________________
Comments on my blog:
Chris:
I like what your mom said. She is really right about the preparation part but I like a lot of what you wrote. I feel like narratives should be exactly what you were thinking because it is your narrative. If this is how you felt about the topic then I think this is good. My favorite line was when you introduced everyone because these were the "characters" in the narrative and the way you set it up actually made me interested in wanting to read this even though I was there. I feel like your mom was right at the end too when she said write down certain questions and I feel like thats how this post could have been better. I seriously do like this post a lot though I'm just supposed to say something that is a criticism and thats the only thing I think that could have helped.
Mom:
Sounds like the experience was not very successful. Your writing seem a bit too "light" for the subject. I think you all must prepare more for this type of assignment and have a plan B to fall back on, if something fails. You have been to several funerals and could maybe have reflected on your past experiences and compared them with the other people in the group. Write down certain questions for the funeral director etc.
Kevin:
For a project that doesn't really prove anything, you did a good job writing about it. You wrote a decent amount, and in that amount you started to make some insights. What you didn't do was expand on the insights you started to make. You could have talked more about the serious feelings that you felt and the dress code that you noticed.
What your blog did do: It was entertaining. It was like Seinfeld, about nothing, but at the same time the way you wrote made it more interesting then most other projects with heavier content. It was definitely more interesting then my project.
What you should have done is reflected on the experience. You could have wrote about what you learned through your failure. There was a couple of things you could have talked about learning but you failed to do so.
Sophia:
I really liked this part:
"Even though this didn't work out as we wanted I still looked at it as a somewhat successful experience. It showed me how serious and sensitive death is to people. I saw how serious the dress code was because I felt horrible that I was the only one (besides Kevin) who wasn't dressed up in a black suit and I don't know if I should feel bad about that. I saw how the funeral home approaches death, because the vibe of serious and quiet was very strong as soon as you walk in the place."
This was my favorite part, because I always wondered why people dressed up for funerals. It doesn't really make sense - when people are unhappy, they generally don't want to put a lot of effort into the way they look. I suppose it is out of respect, but I still don't understand why people would be so strict about it.
Ruben:
Jasper, I liked how you and your group decided to go for a hands on experience. Even if you weren't ready for the wake, your group members still tried to get as much information as possible. What you learned from this experience should help you with other projects in the future.
Monday, May 16, 2011
HW 55
The little video we took probably SUCKS (so check out this crazy narrative in the mind of Jasper HIMSELF).
SIGHHHHHHH. Where to start with this project? We have a super project group which usually consists of Chris, Kevin and I. But this project we got a new member! Lucas. Bright young fella that we thought could contribute a lot. We usually chose to do the hands on option for our projects which is usually recording video footage of us going out into the world and exploring the topic we're studying, so we all grouped up and figured out that this project we were going to go to a funeral home and see if we could go to a funeral or a wake, Chris told us he knew the president of a funeral home uptown so we got the number and called Thursday in class. Lucas (we decided was the best to talk on the phone) pretended to be Chris and the person he talked to told us that we could come observe a public wake at 3-4PM on saturday. I was thinking this is great! because we had this planned out and everything was running smooth opposed to the previous project which was a last minute mess. Plus my birthday was on Sunday so I didn't want to push this off until then. I was going to go away for the weekend but I decided I would stay home for this!
Come Saturday, I set my alarm clock for 12AM instead of 12PM (I think that's right). So I get a text message that woke me up and I took a look at the digital clock, oh 11:22, then I do a double take and oh sh**! It's actually 1:22! So I rushed and got ready. I ended pretty much on time. The train took forever to come of course. I ended up arriving at the funeral home a little after 3 and I called up Chris, and he came over in a minute. We went into the funeral home, it was quiet and dim lighting with dark walls and floors everyone in and around was dressed up in mostly black. I felt bad that I didn't dress in the same way (I had a blue polo shirt on and jeans and of course I was only with Chris at this point who had on a suit). It was VERY quiet and riiiight as we walked in Chris' phone started ringing and everyone looked at us, I answered his phone and went outside. It was Lucas he just got out the train station and I told him how to get to the funeral home. When I went back in Chris was talking to the receptionist and she didn't know who talked to us, she told us we usually would not be able to just sit in on a wake. When Lucas arrived he told her exactly what he was told when he was on the phone but she told us the same thing and told us you're always supposed to get a name of who you're talking to on the phone. She told us to sit and wait and the funeral director would come down and talk to us. Then Kevin showed up also. We were all waiting in the little waiting room and watching a bunch of people come and go. Everyone was super serious and really dressed up even the little kids that were like 2. Everyone looked depressed even the people working there. I felt that I had to whisper when we were talking in the waiting room. Eventually at 4 o'clock the funeral director showed up and told us that we couldn't observe because the next part of the service is starting which is a more personal thing for the family and we would have been able to observe if we came earlier (but we could have been observing while we were waiting for him the whole time, but I knew he was going to come down when the wake was ending I bet Chris while we were waiting). He was nice about it though and I thought there's not much we can do about that so I said alright thanks and we left. Even though this didn't work out as we wanted I still looked at it as a somewhat successful experience. It showed me how serious and sensitive death is to people. I saw how serious the dress code was because I felt horrible that I was the only one (besides Kevin) who wasn't dressed up in a black suit and I don't know if I should feel bad about that. I saw how the funeral home approaches death, because the vibe of serious and quiet was very strong as soon as you walk in the place. Just how people look around and in the funeral home says a lot everyone was so serious but as soon as we crossed the street leaving the vibe was gone, and we went to IHOP which I said is kind of like a funeral because usually everyone goes out together and gets food. In my mind this could've been looked at as a negative but I flipped it to a positive and had a hands on experience with the care of the death.
The bad short video we took if you wanna see: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knI-nnK-Asg
SIGHHHHHHH. Where to start with this project? We have a super project group which usually consists of Chris, Kevin and I. But this project we got a new member! Lucas. Bright young fella that we thought could contribute a lot. We usually chose to do the hands on option for our projects which is usually recording video footage of us going out into the world and exploring the topic we're studying, so we all grouped up and figured out that this project we were going to go to a funeral home and see if we could go to a funeral or a wake, Chris told us he knew the president of a funeral home uptown so we got the number and called Thursday in class. Lucas (we decided was the best to talk on the phone) pretended to be Chris and the person he talked to told us that we could come observe a public wake at 3-4PM on saturday. I was thinking this is great! because we had this planned out and everything was running smooth opposed to the previous project which was a last minute mess. Plus my birthday was on Sunday so I didn't want to push this off until then. I was going to go away for the weekend but I decided I would stay home for this!
Come Saturday, I set my alarm clock for 12AM instead of 12PM (I think that's right). So I get a text message that woke me up and I took a look at the digital clock, oh 11:22, then I do a double take and oh sh**! It's actually 1:22! So I rushed and got ready. I ended pretty much on time. The train took forever to come of course. I ended up arriving at the funeral home a little after 3 and I called up Chris, and he came over in a minute. We went into the funeral home, it was quiet and dim lighting with dark walls and floors everyone in and around was dressed up in mostly black. I felt bad that I didn't dress in the same way (I had a blue polo shirt on and jeans and of course I was only with Chris at this point who had on a suit). It was VERY quiet and riiiight as we walked in Chris' phone started ringing and everyone looked at us, I answered his phone and went outside. It was Lucas he just got out the train station and I told him how to get to the funeral home. When I went back in Chris was talking to the receptionist and she didn't know who talked to us, she told us we usually would not be able to just sit in on a wake. When Lucas arrived he told her exactly what he was told when he was on the phone but she told us the same thing and told us you're always supposed to get a name of who you're talking to on the phone. She told us to sit and wait and the funeral director would come down and talk to us. Then Kevin showed up also. We were all waiting in the little waiting room and watching a bunch of people come and go. Everyone was super serious and really dressed up even the little kids that were like 2. Everyone looked depressed even the people working there. I felt that I had to whisper when we were talking in the waiting room. Eventually at 4 o'clock the funeral director showed up and told us that we couldn't observe because the next part of the service is starting which is a more personal thing for the family and we would have been able to observe if we came earlier (but we could have been observing while we were waiting for him the whole time, but I knew he was going to come down when the wake was ending I bet Chris while we were waiting). He was nice about it though and I thought there's not much we can do about that so I said alright thanks and we left. Even though this didn't work out as we wanted I still looked at it as a somewhat successful experience. It showed me how serious and sensitive death is to people. I saw how serious the dress code was because I felt horrible that I was the only one (besides Kevin) who wasn't dressed up in a black suit and I don't know if I should feel bad about that. I saw how the funeral home approaches death, because the vibe of serious and quiet was very strong as soon as you walk in the place. Just how people look around and in the funeral home says a lot everyone was so serious but as soon as we crossed the street leaving the vibe was gone, and we went to IHOP which I said is kind of like a funeral because usually everyone goes out together and gets food. In my mind this could've been looked at as a negative but I flipped it to a positive and had a hands on experience with the care of the death.
The bad short video we took if you wanna see: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knI-nnK-Asg
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
HW 54
Even though I don't really practice religion very much I am Christian and grew up in that religion. I decided to compare two religions to see the different ways that they approach death. I chose to compare Christianity to Buddhism because Buddhism is a popular religion and I have learned a little about it in the past. I know they had a different view of life after death, so I wanted to do some research and look at how the two religions go about the topic.
Christians believe that you have one life on earth. Then based on your actions and beliefs in life it is decided if you go to heaven (Final Judgement). In heaven there is eternal life where God and other people you know are present. There is no suffering and sins in heaven. Some Christians also believe in hell which is where people who sin or are non believers of God go to and it is torture, they suffer (eternally for some religions).
Buddhists on the other hand have completely different beliefs of what happens after someone dies. The religion teaches that you are stuck in a cycle of life (samsara), after you die there is rebirth and you die and then you're born again. How good your life is each time depends on your Karma which depends on the persons sins and actions in the previous lives. Their goal is to get out of this repetitive cycle and reach Nirvana. Nirvana is a state in which there is no suffering, desire, or sense of self. The person is released from the effects of karma and samsara. They are free.
Obviously, their beliefs on after life are very different from each other. I found this interesting because although the beliefs are very different, both religions have a similar theme. They both have some kind of reason to keep people going and to make people do good. They both try to keep people from sinning and doing bad because the people think that they will be rewarded. They both have this peaceful place that is the goal: heaven and Nirvana (even though it's not a place). This connects to the book I was reading about care of the dead called Curtains because the author talks about how all religions have similar parts because he believes that if we thought we just disappear when we die we wouldn't get anything done. I find this idea very interesting. I think that the Buddhist way is a little negative though because it kind of seems like they make life seem like a bad thing filled with suffering from this unnecessary greed and desire. But overall they still have this peaceful thing that is the goal for everyone to reach.
Refrences:
http://www.religionfacts.com/buddhism/cycle.htm
http://www.religionfacts.com/christianity/beliefs/afterlife.htm
http://www.religioustolerance.org/buddhism4.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddhism_and_Christianity
Christians believe that you have one life on earth. Then based on your actions and beliefs in life it is decided if you go to heaven (Final Judgement). In heaven there is eternal life where God and other people you know are present. There is no suffering and sins in heaven. Some Christians also believe in hell which is where people who sin or are non believers of God go to and it is torture, they suffer (eternally for some religions).
Buddhists on the other hand have completely different beliefs of what happens after someone dies. The religion teaches that you are stuck in a cycle of life (samsara), after you die there is rebirth and you die and then you're born again. How good your life is each time depends on your Karma which depends on the persons sins and actions in the previous lives. Their goal is to get out of this repetitive cycle and reach Nirvana. Nirvana is a state in which there is no suffering, desire, or sense of self. The person is released from the effects of karma and samsara. They are free.
Obviously, their beliefs on after life are very different from each other. I found this interesting because although the beliefs are very different, both religions have a similar theme. They both have some kind of reason to keep people going and to make people do good. They both try to keep people from sinning and doing bad because the people think that they will be rewarded. They both have this peaceful place that is the goal: heaven and Nirvana (even though it's not a place). This connects to the book I was reading about care of the dead called Curtains because the author talks about how all religions have similar parts because he believes that if we thought we just disappear when we die we wouldn't get anything done. I find this idea very interesting. I think that the Buddhist way is a little negative though because it kind of seems like they make life seem like a bad thing filled with suffering from this unnecessary greed and desire. But overall they still have this peaceful thing that is the goal for everyone to reach.
Refrences:
http://www.religionfacts.com/buddhism/cycle.htm
http://www.religionfacts.com/christianity/beliefs/afterlife.htm
http://www.religioustolerance.org/buddhism4.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddhism_and_Christianity
Monday, May 9, 2011
HW 53
I decided to interview my grandfather because I just recently learned that he was a hearse driver for a funeral home after he retired. I never knew this so I thought it would be interesting to talk to him about it. I didn't want to bother him much I just asked him a few questions to see if I could get a basic understanding of what his experience was. I made up questions based up on my curiosity about what it is like to work with dead people and I was wondering if a job in the funeral business would have an affect on your own personal views.
I interviewed him over the phone so I didn't get his word for word answers so I just put the basic answers that he gave me to the questions.
The questions I asked were:
What were your responsibilities for the job?
He said that he started out just helping out a friend (who was a funeral director) at one funeral carrying the casket and things like that and at the end the guy gave him some money and then from there he started helping maybe once a week. Then it was like 2 or 3 funerals in one day that he was driving the dead bodies around or the families. He said basically his job was to transport the people and just make them as comfortable as possible.
How did it feel to be working with dead people every day? Did it feel weird to be driving around these dead bodies and being around people mourning?
He said this had no affect on him, he didn't feel strange with driving around dead people and being around people mourning, he had been around death during his life already.
Did this job change the view you have on death and funerals?
He said that this job, which he had for about 10-12 years, did not change his view on death and funerals at all.
These were the answers I could have probably expected from my grandfather, he's a nice man but he's not easily phased and bothered by things. He is very laid back and very practical and takes things for what they are without questioning or blowing things out of proportion. Birth, death, babies, old people, it's part of life and all very natural to him. Maybe it's from being at war, and having 6 children or just being 86 years old. He has seen friends and family pass away. I still got an understanding of what this job was like for him. From what I heard I believe, that a person with skin not as thick as his, would be more affected by the experience of working in the funeral business. I think that like my grandfather said, you get used to it and it doesn't really seem like a big deal, after a while. I connected this to the movie that we started watching today: A Family Undertaking, because it seems like when people really see and are around death a lot, really seeing death face to face they become more comfortable and accepting of what it really is, a natural progression of life.
I interviewed him over the phone so I didn't get his word for word answers so I just put the basic answers that he gave me to the questions.
The questions I asked were:
What were your responsibilities for the job?
He said that he started out just helping out a friend (who was a funeral director) at one funeral carrying the casket and things like that and at the end the guy gave him some money and then from there he started helping maybe once a week. Then it was like 2 or 3 funerals in one day that he was driving the dead bodies around or the families. He said basically his job was to transport the people and just make them as comfortable as possible.
How did it feel to be working with dead people every day? Did it feel weird to be driving around these dead bodies and being around people mourning?
He said this had no affect on him, he didn't feel strange with driving around dead people and being around people mourning, he had been around death during his life already.
Did this job change the view you have on death and funerals?
He said that this job, which he had for about 10-12 years, did not change his view on death and funerals at all.
These were the answers I could have probably expected from my grandfather, he's a nice man but he's not easily phased and bothered by things. He is very laid back and very practical and takes things for what they are without questioning or blowing things out of proportion. Birth, death, babies, old people, it's part of life and all very natural to him. Maybe it's from being at war, and having 6 children or just being 86 years old. He has seen friends and family pass away. I still got an understanding of what this job was like for him. From what I heard I believe, that a person with skin not as thick as his, would be more affected by the experience of working in the funeral business. I think that like my grandfather said, you get used to it and it doesn't really seem like a big deal, after a while. I connected this to the movie that we started watching today: A Family Undertaking, because it seems like when people really see and are around death a lot, really seeing death face to face they become more comfortable and accepting of what it really is, a natural progression of life.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
HW 52
Book: Curtains by Tom Jokinen
Precis:
Funerals are all about putting the people at peace and make them comfortable. So the funeral business has to work with different religions because religion is important to many people and they have different practices. It isn't that different though because they all are set up to protect the people from getting too emotionally hurt from death. Keep in mind the funeral business is a business though and they make money off all these practices that help people feel better.
Quotes:
"It all starts to sound like a fairy tale, Rena said. At least religious faith, when it comes to death, is a fairy tale that soothes. It doesn't deny there's a monster in the closet or a wolf in the woods, but it tames them."
"All religions, says Solomon, have one thing in common: some belief that is in violation of natural law. The Christian resurrection, the Hindu belief in reincarnation are "facts"for which the the empirical evidence is still pending."
"If we think that we just disappear - snap, lights out - we'd never get any work done, either at the office or in benefit of the gene pool."
Analysis:
I found this last section of the book very interesting but sad at the same time. The way it talks about how society and religion shapes our ways for dealing with death I found really interesting because it explained the reasons instead of just talking about the practices. I also found it sad because the way it made me feel was that we're kind of lying to ourselves and not embracing death for what we know it really is. Our way of living is set up so we can make more meaning to our lives and get work done. I would want to live in a way where you don't have to just think about getting work done but you can really embrace that your time here is limited and you should do what you want to and find what makes you happy. I don't know if I'm just rambling but it made me feel like we're machines and we are being programed to think about stuff a certain way so the world can get work out of us. I also so a lot of the business part of funerals which I also found sad, because it seems like everyone out there's a leech trying to suck the most money out of you.. And especially because death is such a difficult thing to deal with. I connected this to the Food unit from earlier in the year. I connected the two because I got the same feeling from both about the people in the business, they seem like they're just out to make money off of you. The food business knows that you're going to need to eat food and want the cheap and quick food, and the business for funerals know that you're going to have loved ones dying and you're going to follow traditions and want to pay respect to the dead person. They seem like things that are inevitable and there aren't very easy ways out of them.
Precis:
Funerals are all about putting the people at peace and make them comfortable. So the funeral business has to work with different religions because religion is important to many people and they have different practices. It isn't that different though because they all are set up to protect the people from getting too emotionally hurt from death. Keep in mind the funeral business is a business though and they make money off all these practices that help people feel better.
Quotes:
"It all starts to sound like a fairy tale, Rena said. At least religious faith, when it comes to death, is a fairy tale that soothes. It doesn't deny there's a monster in the closet or a wolf in the woods, but it tames them."
"All religions, says Solomon, have one thing in common: some belief that is in violation of natural law. The Christian resurrection, the Hindu belief in reincarnation are "facts"for which the the empirical evidence is still pending."
"If we think that we just disappear - snap, lights out - we'd never get any work done, either at the office or in benefit of the gene pool."
Analysis:
I found this last section of the book very interesting but sad at the same time. The way it talks about how society and religion shapes our ways for dealing with death I found really interesting because it explained the reasons instead of just talking about the practices. I also found it sad because the way it made me feel was that we're kind of lying to ourselves and not embracing death for what we know it really is. Our way of living is set up so we can make more meaning to our lives and get work done. I would want to live in a way where you don't have to just think about getting work done but you can really embrace that your time here is limited and you should do what you want to and find what makes you happy. I don't know if I'm just rambling but it made me feel like we're machines and we are being programed to think about stuff a certain way so the world can get work out of us. I also so a lot of the business part of funerals which I also found sad, because it seems like everyone out there's a leech trying to suck the most money out of you.. And especially because death is such a difficult thing to deal with. I connected this to the Food unit from earlier in the year. I connected the two because I got the same feeling from both about the people in the business, they seem like they're just out to make money off of you. The food business knows that you're going to need to eat food and want the cheap and quick food, and the business for funerals know that you're going to have loved ones dying and you're going to follow traditions and want to pay respect to the dead person. They seem like things that are inevitable and there aren't very easy ways out of them.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
HW 51
Book: Curtains by Tom Jokinen
Precis:
Everyone has a role to play in our society when it comes to death. They can't act too sad because grief is a sign of weakness in society. We also have an obsession with happiness and entertainment a sad person doesn't fit the norm and grief is not entertaining at all. So we feel bad about grieving and being depressed about death. We do anything we can to change the death process into something it's not to ease the grief.
Quotes:
"We treat mourning as a weakness, a self-indulgence, and that a modern widow would no more throw herself on the casket than she would take off her clothes or pee in public."
"In the end, a simple cremation, advertised at $695, wound up costing the family $2,100 with province of Manitoba's blessing."
"Without some system of defence we'd be paralyzed with overwhelming terror over the fact that we're 'breathing,defecating pieces of meat, no more important or durable than a lizard or a potato,' he says. So what we did, cleverly and quite unconsciously was to collaborate in the construction of culture to give us a sense that we live in a world that has meaning, a world with art and industry and borders and trade rules and quality daytime talk-television, all earthly distractions from the nasty fact parked in our heads we are doomed."
Analysis:
I found this part of the book even more interesting because it goes more into the society and reasons for the ways we go about when dealing with the dead. It explains how society shapes us to feel about death and also mentions religion and how we make ourselves believe that death is not really the end and that the dead person is going to a better place. I think it's interesting that we try to fantasize in our ways of dealing with death. We do things to block out the pain and find ways not to show our sadness. I also found a bunch of things sad like how the funeral services seem to be crooked and trying to just make as much money off the people who are suffering already from losing someone. Also things like people wanting to have light "pure" ashes, whatever that means... It shouldn't matter what color the persons ashes are! It just seems ridiculous and makes me feel like people are just trying to create this fantasy in their head. It makes me wonder how can we deal with death in a more genuine way? Interesting book...
Precis:
Everyone has a role to play in our society when it comes to death. They can't act too sad because grief is a sign of weakness in society. We also have an obsession with happiness and entertainment a sad person doesn't fit the norm and grief is not entertaining at all. So we feel bad about grieving and being depressed about death. We do anything we can to change the death process into something it's not to ease the grief.
Quotes:
"We treat mourning as a weakness, a self-indulgence, and that a modern widow would no more throw herself on the casket than she would take off her clothes or pee in public."
"In the end, a simple cremation, advertised at $695, wound up costing the family $2,100 with province of Manitoba's blessing."
"Without some system of defence we'd be paralyzed with overwhelming terror over the fact that we're 'breathing,defecating pieces of meat, no more important or durable than a lizard or a potato,' he says. So what we did, cleverly and quite unconsciously was to collaborate in the construction of culture to give us a sense that we live in a world that has meaning, a world with art and industry and borders and trade rules and quality daytime talk-television, all earthly distractions from the nasty fact parked in our heads we are doomed."
Analysis:
I found this part of the book even more interesting because it goes more into the society and reasons for the ways we go about when dealing with the dead. It explains how society shapes us to feel about death and also mentions religion and how we make ourselves believe that death is not really the end and that the dead person is going to a better place. I think it's interesting that we try to fantasize in our ways of dealing with death. We do things to block out the pain and find ways not to show our sadness. I also found a bunch of things sad like how the funeral services seem to be crooked and trying to just make as much money off the people who are suffering already from losing someone. Also things like people wanting to have light "pure" ashes, whatever that means... It shouldn't matter what color the persons ashes are! It just seems ridiculous and makes me feel like people are just trying to create this fantasy in their head. It makes me wonder how can we deal with death in a more genuine way? Interesting book...
Sunday, May 1, 2011
HW 50
Book: Curtains by Tom Jokinen
Precis:
Working in a funeral home is strange and uncomfortable, to be around all these bodies with no life. The bodies are all dressed up and painted to appear as if they are still alive. It's hard to get used to because it's not natural. In our society we are covering up how death really looks to help people deal with death.
Quotes:
"Why do we each spend up to $10,000- for most, the third-biggest cash outlay in our lives after a house and a car, according to Jessica Mitford, who wrote The American Way of Death- on funerals?"
"To stick to the skin, real makeup needs heat, which the dead no longer have. Mortician's makeup is more like paint. The green woman needs a heavy base."
"His eyes are open one more than the other, but they're dry and foggy. This is the unembalmed, undecorated, raw look of death."
Analysis:
This book is craaaaaazy. It's interesting because I (along with probably everyone else) don't really know about the process of what actually happens to a dead body before the funeral. It's strange to think about how people try to make a dead person look alive, it's not natural. We are trying to make up death to look like something that it's actually not. A dead body isn't supposed to look good. We are separated from death in our society and in order to help people deal with it we make the bodies look good and put them in a box to keep things out when they're buried. We change death from what it really is in order to help ourselves deal with the pain of losing someone.. The book is helping me understand why our dominant social practices around death are the way they are.
Precis:
Working in a funeral home is strange and uncomfortable, to be around all these bodies with no life. The bodies are all dressed up and painted to appear as if they are still alive. It's hard to get used to because it's not natural. In our society we are covering up how death really looks to help people deal with death.
Quotes:
"Why do we each spend up to $10,000- for most, the third-biggest cash outlay in our lives after a house and a car, according to Jessica Mitford, who wrote The American Way of Death- on funerals?"
"To stick to the skin, real makeup needs heat, which the dead no longer have. Mortician's makeup is more like paint. The green woman needs a heavy base."
"His eyes are open one more than the other, but they're dry and foggy. This is the unembalmed, undecorated, raw look of death."
Analysis:
This book is craaaaaazy. It's interesting because I (along with probably everyone else) don't really know about the process of what actually happens to a dead body before the funeral. It's strange to think about how people try to make a dead person look alive, it's not natural. We are trying to make up death to look like something that it's actually not. A dead body isn't supposed to look good. We are separated from death in our society and in order to help people deal with it we make the bodies look good and put them in a box to keep things out when they're buried. We change death from what it really is in order to help ourselves deal with the pain of losing someone.. The book is helping me understand why our dominant social practices around death are the way they are.
HW 49
My comments on other blogs:
Javon:
I liked your post because it brought up a lot of aspects about death that I haven't even thought about since starting the unit. Such as the part where you say that people get more respect and “a lot of people who act like they care”.. This made me think about why does death change how everyone thinks about you? I also never thought: is the care of the dead even significant? Does it even matter what you do with the person once they're dead? It made me think a lot.. Good post.
Amanda:
I really liked this blog post. The way it was written made me automatically think of the gold fish as if they were people and got me thinking about what's the right and wrong way to deal with a death.. I liked it because it was talking about gold fish so it made everything seem simple and not as big of a deal.. I enjoyed reading it!
Chris:
I liked your blog post because even though you didn't know much about the care of the dead you still found some topics to go into which I found to be very interesting.. I liked how you talked about how being around someone dead at a funeral brings up death which is often pushed off to the very back of everyones mind. This made me think: would it even be possible to live without having death pushed off to the back of your mind? I also like how you talk about the affect of death on other people because I think that's a very important thing when thinking about care of the dead. When you die you're gone, it's the people around you that are going to be affected and have to keep living.
______________________________________________________________________
Comments on my blog:
Amanda:
Hey Jasper,
Your post does a wonderful job of comparing and contrasting a few viewpoints on care of the dead, your writing is thoughtful and also succinct. The questions and answers you wrote about presented new points of view that I had not considered. I enjoy how through out your summary you compare the others points of view to your own beliefs.
Mom:
I like how you got different opinions and viewpoints of how people view funerals and care of the dead. It was interesting to hear to hear views of traditions and how they make sense to some and maybe not to others. It is quite evident that everyone is different and what is right for one, may not necessarily be right for another. Therefore, it make sense to talk about it and find out how people want to be cared for after their death.
Chris:
Hey Jasper,
I think that you have a good blog post. The different interviews do bring different points up, and it is clear that there are different ideas on the way "correct" care of the dead is to be done. I like that you talked about you're ideas though when analyzing this. I think something that some people could have miss understood (like myself) about this blog is only analyzing what people said. This is good but there needs to be what the blogger thinks about the topic incorporated as well. This is your blog of course. So I think that and the comparison between your view, the first person's view and the third persons view. The second person slacked.
Javon:
Jasper I enjoyed reading your post because the questions you decided to ask where questions I was curious about. The different interviews were significant to the post because you were able to get more then one opinion and point of view. The thing that stood out the most to me was how you compared your personal beliefs to the people being interviewed beliefs. Keep up the good work.
Javon:
I liked your post because it brought up a lot of aspects about death that I haven't even thought about since starting the unit. Such as the part where you say that people get more respect and “a lot of people who act like they care”.. This made me think about why does death change how everyone thinks about you? I also never thought: is the care of the dead even significant? Does it even matter what you do with the person once they're dead? It made me think a lot.. Good post.
Amanda:
I really liked this blog post. The way it was written made me automatically think of the gold fish as if they were people and got me thinking about what's the right and wrong way to deal with a death.. I liked it because it was talking about gold fish so it made everything seem simple and not as big of a deal.. I enjoyed reading it!
Chris:
I liked your blog post because even though you didn't know much about the care of the dead you still found some topics to go into which I found to be very interesting.. I liked how you talked about how being around someone dead at a funeral brings up death which is often pushed off to the very back of everyones mind. This made me think: would it even be possible to live without having death pushed off to the back of your mind? I also like how you talk about the affect of death on other people because I think that's a very important thing when thinking about care of the dead. When you die you're gone, it's the people around you that are going to be affected and have to keep living.
______________________________________________________________________
Comments on my blog:
Amanda:
Hey Jasper,
Your post does a wonderful job of comparing and contrasting a few viewpoints on care of the dead, your writing is thoughtful and also succinct. The questions and answers you wrote about presented new points of view that I had not considered. I enjoy how through out your summary you compare the others points of view to your own beliefs.
Mom:
I like how you got different opinions and viewpoints of how people view funerals and care of the dead. It was interesting to hear to hear views of traditions and how they make sense to some and maybe not to others. It is quite evident that everyone is different and what is right for one, may not necessarily be right for another. Therefore, it make sense to talk about it and find out how people want to be cared for after their death.
Chris:
Hey Jasper,
I think that you have a good blog post. The different interviews do bring different points up, and it is clear that there are different ideas on the way "correct" care of the dead is to be done. I like that you talked about you're ideas though when analyzing this. I think something that some people could have miss understood (like myself) about this blog is only analyzing what people said. This is good but there needs to be what the blogger thinks about the topic incorporated as well. This is your blog of course. So I think that and the comparison between your view, the first person's view and the third persons view. The second person slacked.
Javon:
Jasper I enjoyed reading your post because the questions you decided to ask where questions I was curious about. The different interviews were significant to the post because you were able to get more then one opinion and point of view. The thing that stood out the most to me was how you compared your personal beliefs to the people being interviewed beliefs. Keep up the good work.
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